Strangers will never know how happy they made me today

New favorite attitude: Hopeful for positive changes, accepting of limitations, loving my kids with my ears, nose, eyes and lips.

New favorite song: The Middle - By Jimmy Eat World (click to listen to it)

I love that it is upbeat. I love the words. I love the lines at the start


Hey, don't write yourself off yet


It's only in your head you feel left out


Or looked down on


Just try your best, try everything you can


And don't you worry what they tell themselves


When you're away.




It just takes some time,


little girl in the middle of the ride


Everything, everything will be just fine


Everything, everything it'll be alright

I've finally read about NieNie and her sister and saw the hope and love in her blog before the accident. And the faith and service afterwards. Thanks Cousin Cori, for letting me know about them. Reading the story from the start gave me much needed prospective and a much needed cry.

I've had moments of beauty every day. Many every day. The nights are dark and dreary. But I'm not alone. Yes, God is there somewhere. And the prayers and angels that they say are with me. Most importantly, I have Grant by my side.

He doesn't complain when I toss and turn and wake him up. He holds me close when I can't endure alone. He reminds me that the meds will help. And he gives me hope that even if I'm never the same again......




even if I'm never the same as I was two years ago....

I will still have his love.

He will still want me at home with our family.

He will continue to work extra as I learn my new limitations.

He will hate the constant flow of photography

But he will love the laughter and the chubby baby cuteness that I'm capturing

And I will still have his strong arms and cozy tummy to seek shelter.

Dec 2, 2008 Giving up on a traditional family photo

My husband. My eternal companion. The man I've loved more than anyone else on earth. The man who's better than Edward

because he will never leave me (I'm reading book 2 again)

Reliving the heartaches of so many high school break ups thru Bella's loss...then having the love of Grant around me

I'll never be able to tell the band Jimmy Eats World that their song gave me hope during this ride of recovery. I'll probably not tell Nie Nie and her family how their years of blogging that I read in one day turned my broken spirit around. Lastly, Stephanie Meyers will never meet me, one of millions of fans, and know how the Twilight series was my favorite recovery drug. And gave a much needed burst of romance to our exhausted marriage. Three groups of people who were strangers to me. Three groups of people to whom I will always be a stranger. Thank you Lord, for such wonderful talent in the world that is full of so much suffering.