I realized it's been a long time (for me) since I updated.
Am I alive? I ponder than question myself.
A: Angry. A lot of anger. A drug interaction hopefully. If not, I need new family. This one will throw me out soon. Alex chopped off the top of his finger, fracturing it at the same time. No rough playing, no bikes, no writing (it was his RIGHT HAND), no NEW PIANO LESSONS (finally got to the top of the list) NO! For two weeks. Poor Alex. (Gross: it was to the bone, and all his finger nail, and I get to clean it and do something with gauze so gross, I won't write it)
L: Love. Only towards ice cream. And Mark. Oh, I love Mark. As a boy, then a man, I don't think he'll ever know how much I gave up because of him. I didn't know at the time of conception that my health would...what has my health done? I didn't know at the time of conception that I would never have a pain free day again. 2 years and counting. But, oh I love ice cream! Vanilla, two scoops (costco only) on one of the 200 ice cream cones we have. Loestra...damn you! I'm on birth control (Loestra) to stop having periods, to stop one stoppable reason for pain. I also stopped being skinny. I will never blame ice cream.
I: I am an invalid. In some ways, on more day, I exchange invalid for motherhood. I also find that my schedule for sleep and activity is loosening the grip of invalid. In valid. In a week, it is time for the first day of school!
V: vain. I'm becoming vain about my weight gain. Which proves I was more vain about my weight loss than I thought. Vain enough that I'm back on a diet. Vucky.
E: Eh. I'm tired of thinking of letters. And it's time to be asleep. "A" is a much easier letter to write about. No wait! Eternal Families! We just finished FHE where we read a paragraph a week. It's taken months. But we finished. So I took pictures. And made a sepia colored collage. And yesterday, Our family and Joe wrote words from the proclamation that were meaningful to us. I helped both Alex and Kate. Someday, if this anger fades, and pain returns me to bed, I'll get to show you the photos and stuff.
Was Alex's finger tip reattached? Did I tell you about the time my dad almost cut his finger off with a power saw? It was his first cut while working on the back deck and when he screamed, my mom went flying across the house. Luckily, it just broke the bone.
ReplyDeleteThe doctor put the wrong splint on his finger. He complained more and more about it feeling worse until a doctor realized it was a thumb splint. It was shaping his finger into a thumb! They had to do surgery and start over because the break had become worse than ever. He's finally playing the guitar again, but it took another surgery. He's much better now.
You don't look like you've gained weight to me, but I'm not always the most observant. I think you look great! And I'm thinking back to the time when you didn't feel well enough to eat much of anything, so happy you're enjoying ice cream. :)
I like your comment Sarah. It reminds me of the time sarina fell down the stairs at the banks house. We went to get her checked and they put a split on her and sent her home. We found out later from children's it was just nurses elbow and needed to be popped back in. I had to laugh at how stupid the doctors at evergreen were. I thought you looked like you lost weight. :) SMILE
ReplyDeleteSomeday I hope you can look back on this NIGHTMARE and realize what you have learned from the process and all the pain. In the meantime, know that I ALWAYS put your name on the prayer roll here--probably before the last one had expired (since I tend to be in the temple several times in two weeks). You are in my thoughts more often than I comment on your blog. Much much love, G
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